Ramblings of a Newbie

So the nice people at Sextoy.com sent me this awesome little Impressions paddle to tell you about. It’s made by a company called Sportsheets which I already love dearly for their Underbed Restraint System, so I had high hopes. I wasn’t disappointed.

It’s a smallish thing, which is pretty darn okay. It could easily sit anonymously in the bottom of a large purse and never be noticed. The design is simple: nicely sized handle, wide enough to be comfortable to the hand, in stitched leather over something stiff (plastic or wood, likely. Too light to be metal, I think?). There’s a grommet with a braided nylon wrist-strap. If you don’t like the nylon, switch it out for leather. It’ll work just as well.

The teabag is there for scale. Also because I simply wanted to work the word ‘teabag’ into a post.

The usable portion of the paddle (the ‘weapon’ part) is about five inches long and two and a quarter inches wide. You’ll notice from the picture that the word ‘OUCH’ is backwards. There’s a reason for that, don’t you worry. It’s a two-layered slapper-style paddle, as you can see from the next picture; this gives it a tendency to make a great noise even if your swats are somewhat sub-par. It’s flexible, but stiff enough to really pack a whallop if used properly.

As you can also see from the pic, the word ‘OUCH’ is a cutout. What that means to you is this:

That’s right. If done right, you get the word ‘OUCH’ in lovely lettering on your vic-…er, playmate’s body. It’s too much fun, especially in a group setting. Everybody wants to try their hand at getting the word to come up just a little clearer, there’s discussions about whose skin is pale enough to make the better background…it’s a lot of fun.

My only complaint about this toy is a small nitpicky one. When you look at the paddle itself, the ‘OUCH’ is in red. This is due to a piece of red paper between the layers. Good concept…but the fact that it’s paper kinda bugs me. A thin strip of suede between the layers or even lining the back layer in red leather would have been a little more finished-looking to me. The paper does just fine, but if it gets stained or torn, it’s done, and you’re looking at the roughly sueded back layer. It’s an aesthetic thing only, guys…I’m willing to overlook it, personally.

Overall, this is a really sturdy, well-stitched fun toy. I dig it quite a bit, as does CK (as long as he’s not on the receiving end). There’s other words as well, but this one just made me giggle.

Remember, kids, OUCH is not a safeword!

Sex toys provided by SexToy.com. Check out our excellent selection of bondage and bdsm products online. Butt provided by CK.

(Note for disclosure purposes: This product was provided free of charge for review purposes by Sextoy.com. I promise you that free product does not in any way ensure a good review; I have given products negative reviews in the past and will do so in the future if the product warrants it. )

It’s been a while since I’ve done a review…my life’s been going through a great many changes, mostly for the good, for a change. I’ll write about my life later on, though. Let’s get to the toy!!

One of the products I’ve asked to review is the Horse Bit Gag from Sextoy.com. I’d used one once in the past and enjoyed it; I didn’t get a good chance to examine it, however. This one I got to play with and dig into.

The design is extremely simple: two large rings on either end of a short length of rubber, leather straps also attached to the rings. Have your submissive/bottom/playpartner open their mouth, adjust the rubber length between their teeth and have them bite down to seat it properly. Buckle it while your sub has it between their teeth and it’s less likely to slip back too far when buckled.

It’s a sexy look, actually. There’s something about the oversized rings that makes it…I don’t know, exotic. The rings are super-shiny, the gag and straps more matte.  When I examined the straps I was pleased to find that they were actually riveted quite securely. These straps aren’t going to be under the same kinds of pulling and tugging as the straps on a pair of cuffs, but they’re just as sturdy.

The openings in the rings are very flush but aren’t soldered and I was a bit concerned that my long hair would get pinched. I actually tried to get my hair caught in one and I couldn’t do it. No worries there. The buckle is simple and easy to close securely and undo in a hurry if necessary.

A quick glimpse:

I like it quite a bit, actually. I have TMJ and was therefore a bit wary about using any kind of gag; a ballgag would be right out, I think. This one is comfortable for a period of time.

One caveat, and one that likely pertains to any type of gag that keeps the mouth open like this: Your mouth will water and there is likely to be drool. If your top is nice (or if they don’t notice *innocent whistle*) they’ll make it a tiny bit loose so you’ll be able to push the gag out and swallow occasionally. If your top likes drool…well, there you are.  As for the material, I’m not sure if it’s silicone or rubber. When in doubt, make it a one-person toy. The nice thing is it’s reasonably-priced enough that that’s not a problem.

CK and I haven’t really played much lately as life has gotten in the way, so when he started digging out toys last night it was a pleasant surprise. Earlier in the week I’d mentioned that I’d been watching a video of Mark Davis and Leah Jaye (no idea of the title, apologies) and had in the conversation described a few of the scenes. One of those had Mark putting a ball gag into Leah’s mouth and then making her count out each swat to the ass…I laughed when I mentioned how mean I thought that was.

Apparently that thought stuck, because CK broke out the bit gag and fastened it securely between my teeth. The gag doesn’t stop you from making noise, mind you, it merely stops you from enunciating properly. It also puts me into a very submissive headspace very quickly.  He buckled the strap and then bent me over the bed so I couldn’t see what else he was grabbing.

He started in on me first with his hands, spanking me hard enough that I was whimpering around the length of rubber in my mouth. The muffled cries just seemed to make him slap my ass faster and harder; then he grabbed the floggers. Now I have to admit, I don’t remember the order of the toys, but twice he made me count blows from one to twenty with this damn gag in my mouth. *grin*  He also made sure I was enunciating as properly as possible, for which I am surely going to get him back. The word “seventeen” is extremely hard to say when there’s something in your mouth. Try it. Seriously.

I had to finally signal him to remove it because something about the way it sat had started triggering my gag reflex. That’s not a fault of the product, mind you, it happens to me sometimes with other things too. Keep that in mind, people. It’s going to be hard for you to say a safeword while wearing this, so make sure you have some kind of non-verbal signals in place as well.

All in all, I liked this product immensely. It’s simple, it’s easy to deal with, and it’s affordable. I haven’t compared it to a ball gag and likely won’t try (I don’t want to irritate my jaw any more than I tend to now), but I’d be curious to see a comparison from someone that’s used both. Anybody?

Sex toys provided by SexToy.com. Check out our excellent selection of bondage and bdsm products online.

(Note for disclosure purposes: This product was provided free of charge for review purposes by Sextoy.com. I promise you that free product does not in any way ensure a good review; I have given products negative reviews in the past and will do so in the future if the product warrants it. )

The house I moved into has bamboo in the backyard. At first I thought it was a few stalks, about two feet worth, amongst some trees. Come to find out the trees _were_ bamboo. It’s still not a huge stand, but it’s far bigger than I expected.

Today I cut down about a nine-foot stalk (stalk? I guess?) and cut it into three more or less equal lengths.

Since cutting the canes and posting the picture on Twitpic, I’ve gotten kudos and similar advice from two people: @papatomla and @thepinkpoppet. @thepinkpoppet also provided me with an excellent link for information: http://www.cane-iac.com/artofcaning.asp .

As I get these trimmed and soaked and ready to use, I’ll post more about the experiments. *salute*

More later!

While searching for cool new sex toys to review, I came across this guy:

It’s Dr Joel Kaplan’s Nipple Pump System 2 (though I’m not sure what happened to System 1). It’s one of the many women’s sex toys you can find on the site.

It’s pretty darn cool, actually. I’d never used one before, so I wasn’t really sure what to expect. I think I kind of expected a sort of suckling sort of thing, but that’s not what this puppy does.

My finger’s in there for scale. It’s actually no fun to use this on yer fingers, so don’t bother. The pump looks like something you’d use to fix a car with. It’s a great mad-scientist looking contraption, and I’m really digging it.

The only downside that I can see (and it’s a really little one, so hardly a downside) is that it came with no hints. Yes, yes, I know, it’s not rocket science. Apply to skin and squeeze the handle thingy. It really is that simple. The hints I would have wanted are things like: skin dry or moist? How much pressure is safe, and for how long? And yes, you can tell pretty exactly how much pressure is being applied:

After a question or two on Twitter, I got the idea that moist skin made for a better seal. Makes sense, really. As for the safety factor, I decided simply to play it by ear and not go hog-wild with it.

I tried it by myself first, and it was a touch awkward because you have to hold the bulbs against their intended targets while you squeeze the handle; now, once you create that seal with a single good pump you can let go of the bulbs. Two or three pumps will draw your nipples deep into the clear plastic cups and cause a tight pinching sensation. It’s nothing like the nasty squeeze of nipple clamps, but it’s still harsh. There’s a release valve at the bottom of the gauge that can either release the vacuum completely or let out a touch at a time to lighten the pressure. I had fun testing it by myself and noticed it really made my nipples insanely sensitive (and they’re already pretty damn sensitive!).

The real test of a toy is sometimes when you can get someone else to use it on you; that’s where CK came in. He’s always willing to oblige me in my playtesting…so altruistic.

He went into my bedroom, grabbed several things from my toybox, and came back into the living room. My top quickly came off and after a moment or two of making sure my nipples were nice and moist (*grin*), he had me hold the bulbs to my nipples while he controlled the handle. One quick pump and I was able to let go, and then he started playing. Two or three quick pumps while I gasped and writhed, then using the valve to release a little pressure; then another quick squeeze or two. This went on for a few minutes, then I decided to try an experiment. There’s a little silver catch on the cups where the cup meets the tubing that looked like it was meant to slide in.

I slid the little catch in, and sure enough I was able to remove the tube and the bulb stayed on, and it was bizarrely hot-looking. However, that broke the vacuum and the other bulb released. I haven’t yet been able to get both bulbs to stay on at once; I think it’s a matter of coordinating it just right. I’ll continue to work on it.

Once CK found out how sensitive my nipples got after this treatment, he had a blast. The other items he pulled out were one of my evil sticks and both sets of clover clamps (his and mine). The clamps got applied readily and the evil stick used post-haste. Those things normally hurt quite a lot, and after the sensitizing influence of the pump it felt like fire on my nipples. Amazingly hot.

The boy grinned at this point and said, “I got an idea”. When he says this, it usually means that I’m going to end up in pain (the happy kind)…so I eyed him warily as he took off my pants. He placed one bulb of the nipple pump on my right nipple and made me hold it. The other one he pressed to my clit. A couple of pumps and I was loving it…I really can’t describe the sensation properly. It was a sucking-squeezing-tugging kind of thing, and it was excellent. And yes, it makes your clit just as sensitive as it makes your nipples.

This product right here? Get it. It’s an awesome playtoy. I like the look of it (very clinical; slightly intimidating), I love the feel of it, and I love that it’s an easy toy to use. I recommend it highly.

After my playtesting of it, I found that Alpine SubDreams had reviewed this product for Sextoy.com as well. Take a look!

Yes, boys and girls, I finally got to utilize my new strapon harness! It was a scene I’d been negotiating with an old friend (he’ll be known as NM here in the blog) for a few weeks…we were talking so much about it because this was going to be a first scene between us and we wanted to make sure we weren’t screwing up a friendship for a scene. He’s hot and all, but friendship’s always more important. Also, he lives a few hours south of me, so it’s not often we actually see each other.

We discussed every possible thing either one of us could think of, up to and including things that simply weren’t going to come into play during our playdate. After a lot of online discussion, we sat down and discussed things over lunch, my theory being that if we couldn’t even talk about a scene face to face, we certainly couldn’t do it. Once we set up a time, it was all anticipation from there. *grin* I told NM to bring his personal toy stash and to wear old clothes that he didn’t mind getting damaged.

He showed up and we hung out for a while, getting comfortable and getting over those first-playtime jitters. I showed him my growing toy collection, went over the toys I wanted to use (both floggers and others), and explained which things I wasn’t going to use and why.

Once we got started, I buckled my cuffs on NM’s wrists and then…the phone rang. *facepalms* Normally I’d ignore it, but this was an anticipated call dealing with a good friend’s parent’s health and therefore I had him buckle the ankle cuffs on himself while I got the update (update was good). While still on the phone, I put a collar on him and clipped the wrist cuffs to the collar. Was kinda fun doing that, actually. Made him a bit nervous, which I dug.

I got off of the phone quickly and had him kneel on the sofa, clipping the ankle cuffs together. I slipped my fingers into the long thick hair at the nape of his neck, clutching tightly and pulling him back against me, growling in his ear.

I’m discovering that nervousness and a little fear in a partner can be enticing for me…hearing his breathing change and feeling his heart race really triggered that predator instinct for me. I quite literally ripped his clothes off of him, each tear of the cloth making him shiver a little bit more.

When he was finally naked, I started on him with my floggers. NM reacts very well, and I had a great deal of fun figuring out which toys he responded to most. I also discovered that he’s ticklish, which makes things even more fun. After a while of warmup flogging, I grabbed the lube and a latex exam glove.

See, I’ve had anal sex on the recieving end. I enjoy it quite a bit, actually. I’ve recently (only in the past few months) started playing with anal toys, and enjoyed them too. I had never done any anal play with me on the pitching rather than the catching side. NM told me he’d teach me where to find the prostate, and it was now time for the moment of truth. I pulled on the glove and playfully snapped it near his ear, then used a generous amount of lube on my fingers and his ass.

I slowly slid my finger into his anus, enjoying his reaction and marveling at the tightness and heat; one of those few times I almost regret not being male and having a biological cock to enjoy the sensations. He guided me to the correct depth, I curled my finger just a bit as if I were teasing a g-spot, and he moaned and said “Ohhh, that’s it.” I grinned and started rubbing side to side, back and forth, tapping, seeing which movements got the best responses, and he helped immensely by answering any question I put to him (I had lots). After a few minutes of this, I lubed up one of my Peridise plugs and slid it home.

More flogging and spanking; a little while passed and I replaced the Peridise with the Nexus Neo Thattoychick threw into my care package, and this got a better response. It has a little external curve you can conveniently use as a handle to manipulate it, and I took advantage of that feature. After even more beatings, I was ready to try my lovely new harness.

First I strapped in the Tantus Ripple. Gripping the base of the toy to keep it in place, I was able to slowly thrust it home; and wow. His reaction to my thrusts (shallow at first…this toy isn’t made for hardcore thrusting until you’re very used to it) was phenomenal, and I had far too much fun with it. I soon switched out to the Acute, which was even better; the smoother surface allowed more movement and more sensation. After a while of this, there were cramped muscles and knees giving out (it’d been over an hour and a half at this point! Time flew…), so I had him demonstrate his Fleshlight for me, and let me tell you, that’s a fun-looking toy for a guy.

After all was said and done, we sat and talked about the things we’d enjoyed and the things that didn’t work so much, and confirmed that we were both good to go for future playdates. I’d like to try to have another harness by that point…we’ll see how that goes. Very successful scene, and no regrets or weirdness on either of our parts. I was pleased. I’m finding that my toppy side is perfectly satisfied by topping; my clothes all stayed firmly in place, there was no sexual contact with my person…but I enjoyed myself immensely, had an absolute blast. I was perfectly happy having my way with NM in a dominant, rather than a sexual, way.

Then, of course, I got on Twitter and announced “I totally just fucked a guy with a strap-on.”. I was thereafter high-fived and welcomed into the ‘guy club’. *nods* A good time was had by all.

A quick set of side-notes/PSAs: For anal play, LUBE. Lots and lots of it. If you think you have enough, add a little more. The more lube you have, the less chance you have of causing actual damage to a spot that can be difficult to heal properly. Also, when inserting anything (fingers, toys, cock, whatever), take your time. Gently and carefully penetrate, push for an inch or two, then pause, let the person’s body get used to the penetration. After a moment or two, continue slowly. Depending on the size of the item and the experience of the person, more pause-times may be necessary. If a toy is used in someone’s ass, it doesn’t go to their vagina (if they have one) without cleaning. Any toys you use must have a flared base. By this I mean the toy can’t simply be straight like a slimline vibe, it has to have a base that flares out so that the toy can’t slip out of your lube-slickened fingers and slide all the way in. Once something gets ‘lost’, you’re likely looking at surgery to get it out. Be smart. Only use toys that make sense. And in your ass as with all other parts, go phthalate-free.

This week I’m reviewing a gorgeous Black and Red suede flogger from Sextoy.com. Of all of the BDSM and fetish items I’ve purchased, made, and gotten for review lately, I have to say this is one of my favorites.

The picture used on the website is really really good, but it has to be. I’ve gotten used to even the good toys looking considerably less perfect when they arrive, and I have to admit after getting the paddle I reviewed last time I was a bit wary. With this one, I was impressed. The colors are gorgeous, the construction absolutely solid. This was obviously made to be used, and made by people who took some pride in their work.

It’s longer than most of the other floggers I have, but is made of a lightweight suede so it’s not an overwhelming toy. It’s easy to swing, and can slap or pack a mild thud depending on how it’s used. It’s very comfortable in the hand and the tails fall as they should, in a predictable arc. As it is a long flogger, please please be wary of wraparound. A trick a friend taught me is to place a folded towel around your bottom’s neck to protect the neck and face against mis-strikes. As I’m relatively new to all of this, it’s a trick I use often. It may look a bit odd, but it gives a little peace of mind.

Now, most of these reviews I tend to give cleaning tips. Suede is kind of its own animal, and I’m not really sure of ways to clean this on the fly so it won’t destroy the material…I’m open to suggestions. I know there are suede cleaners, but not sure how they’ll do on a material that will contact skin. Until we know how to clean ‘em, avoid having the suede touch blood or other potentially hazardous bodily fluids unless it’s going to be a one-person toy. Yes, maybe it’s a touch paranoid, but a little paranoia never hurt anyone.

So anyway, my final verdict: Awesome. Many kinds of awesome. I definitely recommend, and the price is actually seriously good for this flogger. If you’re in the market for a nice lightweight suede warmup toy, this is it.

Check out Sextoy.com for other kinds of nice kinky sex toys, too!

Saturday night was the monthly FAD (Female Artists of Domination) party. The first playparty I went to back in August was put on by the same group, and it was a blast. I was hoping this one would be at least as fun…and I wasn’t disappointed in the least.

It was a ‘Try It, You Might Like It’ event. There were four exhibition areas: CBT, Violet Wand, Needle Play, and Foot Worship. Due to lack of time, it was suggested that people hit their favorite two stations and visit the others if there was time left over. I went, carpooling with FM, CK, and PB; we met SC and DB there.

I hit the violet wand station first. My friend DB (who I had the pleasure of playing with once) was the first demo bottom for it, and the Domme running the wand gave me all kinds of ideas and really made me want a wand of my own… One of these days I’ll indulge myself and pick one up.

Then I went to the needle station, where CK was just finishing up getting a series of needles in his back before trotting off to the violet wand station to get the freshly-installed needles zapped. I stood in the room where the needle demonstrator was starting to explain things to a new group. “Who wants to get stuck?” she asked. I raised my hand, as did two or three others. “Who wants to do the sticking?” she grinned. I raised my hand again, as did one other. DB was trying this out as well, and I watched several needles and learned the hows and whys of play piercing from the lady doing the piercing. SC then offered DB (her new sub) up for my first piercing practice.

I did three needles in his chest, completing the simple pattern the original piercer had started. It was way too fun…and I will be investing in a play piercing kit. Friends be warned. Then I got pierced myself: two needles placed in the upper curve of each breast. WOW that was fun. Next party I’ll be getting a cutting, hopefully, and I think I may enjoy that as well. We’ll see…

I wore the needles (safely corked) for a while and mingled, enjoying the different scenes going on. I watched more violet wand play, talked to friends and new acquaintences, and saw what was probably the most hardcore thing I’ve ever seen in person. A gentleman on the receiving end of a little CBT from his top took several forceps through his scrotum. Not on…through. I’ve been trying to find pics of the particular kind of forceps used, but my google-fu is failing me. These forceps PIERCED HIS SCROTUM. It was so very cool.

After all this, I sat down with a lovely lady named Angel, with whom I’d discussed having a scene, and started negotiations. We agreed that this was going to be kind of a getting-to-know-you thing, nothing too harsh. She’s of the same mindset I am: if you’re not having fun, what’s the point? We discussed her limits, my limits, what I’d experienced before…and then I stepped up to the St Andrew’s Cross.

Before this, I’d never bottomed to anyone but CK and was a little nervous. My friends settled in to watch the fun, and CK actually positioned himself behind the cross itself. FM was curled up by Angel’s toybag, making ‘helpful’ suggestions and handing her various implements. Angel lent me her hair-tie (I can’t believe I didn’t think to bring one; I have very very long hair) and started unhooking my corset. I’m not one to show bare skin in public…this was in fact my first time every being topless in public. My comfort with my own body is increasing by the day, and I’m enjoying the feeling…

She started out softly, running her hands over me to get an idea of my musculature and responsiveness (also, I think, to ferret out a ticklish spot or two). Next came a rabbit-fur flogger that made me relax against the cross and purr happily. The brush of the silky fur against my skin actually helped calm me a bit, I think.

The order of the toys used escapes me at this point, to be honest. She used a selection of different types of floggers: leather, plastic and rope. Angel’s toy collection is incredible, and I’m quite jealous…*grin* There were paddles of leather and paddles of wood, she used canes, she used an evil stick, a wartenberg wheel, and a double pinwheel contraption that I want quite a bit. She even pulled out a small wicked knife; that made my heart do a little backflip. I love blades (collect ‘em, even). It’s also very difficult for me to trust someone with a knife around me. It was a hell of a rush to have a woman I’ve met twice hold a knife to my throat…very hot. It really shocked me a bit how hot I found it, and I’m still kind of processing that a little.

Nipple clamps! She knew I had sensitive nipples and started out with mild clamps, but quickly realized that stronger ones were in order. She affixed my love-hate buddies, the clover clamps and lifted the connecting chain with her cane. Sliding the cane back and forth across the tight chain sent mild vibrations through the clamps to my nipples, and was a really fun move. When those got removed, one was removed nicely and the other pulled off sharply, getting a sympathetic group ‘oooooo!’ from my audience.

It was a relatively lightweight scene compared to many others I’ve seen, but it was a pretty decent one for a newbie. I was vocal as usual, and kept giggling and (apparently) squeaking. It was hot, it was fun, and I can’t wait for a rematch…*grins*

I was left with marks all over. There’s a bite-bruise on my right shoulder (one of her ’signatures), needlemarks on my breasts from the piercings, sunbursts of evil stick marks on each breast, an ‘A’ done with an evil stick on my back (another of Angel’s ’signatures’), and random other evil-stick welts on my back and ass. I also had at least one cane mark on my ass. The evil stick marks are all still visible, but healing.

All in all a great deal of fun and I got to mark off several ‘things I’m curious about’ list items. After the scene, Angel and CK both provided me with comfy blankets and I got petted, cuddled, and told I was a good girl…CK snuggled me for a while after as well. He asked what parts I most enjoyed, but I hadn’t fully processed it all yet and couldn’t really articulate my thoughts well. Even though it was a relatively lightweight scene, I was still pretty wiped out by the end of it.

After my scene, FM was tied to the massage table by SC and she and Angel set to work on him with crops. I watched for a bit, but quite shortly it ended up being four women circling the poor thing. I reminded FM about his ‘helpful’ handing of the evil stick to Angel and then brought up the point that “Y’know…I think we have four evil sticks among us!”. They were all grabbed with great glee. At one point I mentioned that we were like a pack of mean wolves…wolves with evil sticks. The Evil Stick Wolves did bad, bad things to poor FM, and by the end of it his ass and back were bruised, welted, angry red and (in a couple of spots) blooded. He had a lot of fun with that…

A good time was had by all. I can’t wait till the next event I can attend…I learn new things every time.

Happy HNT, y’all!

There’s a FAD (Female Artists of Domination) event tonight, and I’m so there. The last event I went to with this group was about six months ago. The arsenal is packed, the rope is packed, driving arrangements are made, and we’ll be on the road in a few short hours. I can’t wait.

Tonight is a ‘Try It, You Might Like It’ event. How-tos, if you will, for people that want to try giving or recieving different kinds of play they may have never experienced. There’ll be four stations set up: Foot Worship, CBT (cock and ball torture, in case you weren’t sure), Needle Play, and Violet Wand. I’m excited like a kid at Christmas, here!

After the demos are done, I have a scene planned with a lovely and evil lady that’s gonna do bad bad things to me. My first time being topped by anyone other than CK, actually, so I’m a little nervous. Gonna negotiate beforehand.

I’ll report tomorrow, people. Wish me good luck and good fun.

So my friend and mentor SC gifts me with something she knew I’d dig immensely: a bag of spline (rubber cord, essentially) and a pair of pretty O-rings. Do-it-yourself flogger kit!

There was a good amount of the spline in the bag, so I actually split it up and made two floggers.

First I stretched the spline in loops around two dowels. I then cut one end and slipped the ring onto one end of the resulting bundle of seperated strands of spline, sliding it to the middle. This was to be the anchor for the handle end.

I then folded the bundle in half and wrapped the area that was to be the handle in duct tape. Classy, I know. After a few experimental swings, I was satisfied, and I trimmed the ends and put on the finishing touches.

I wrapped the handle in copper wire, and this flogger is going to be a gift for SC. With loving use, the handle will gain an interesting patina from her hand, and she can either choose to leave it as it is for its own sake or polish it to its current coppery brightness.

Today, I made a second one with the remaning spline and wrapped the handle in jute twine. After singeing away the excess fibers, the handle is actually quite comfortable and attractive. This one I’m keepng for me. To give a sense of scale, the whole shebang is 26″, the falls are 20″.

As for how it feels…

It’s heavy enough it can carry a thud, but it has a wicked, wicked bite. This is going to quickly become a favorite toy of mine.

Any suggestions for improvement?

I’ve learned in my short time in the BDSM world that collars can take on a huge significance for some people. If I put a collar on someone, I make sure to let them know that I’m simply placing a collar on them, nothing more.

I hear differing opinions on the idea of collaring as an actual ‘thing’. Some people say it’s baloney, some say it’s more sacred than marriage, and there’s every level of opinion between the two.

What does collaring (again, not the act of placing a collar on someone, but the more ceremonial use of the word) mean to you? Is it a commitment? Is it bollocks? Is it somewhere in-between? Ownership, relationship, or protection?

I really want to hear opinions on this one, so please comment. As always, you can certainly disagree and debate what has been said before, but do so politely, please. We’re all adults here.